Any opinions on my verse?

its good but u suffer a problem with most writers: they take meaning out of the lyrics for the sake of rhyming. for example, the line "Never put my head down, unless I’m lighting it" doesnt really make sense. the rhyme scheme itself is ok in some parts, but its mostly aabbcc, etc, at least make it abab in one point or something. meatphors are ok, and the rest of it seems fine, so i think this would make a great song! keep it up!